I've been going through archives of old emails and stuff, and I ran across some laugh-out-loud jokes I had saved.
To lighten the end of the week, I'll use some of them as a "Saturday Bonus" until they run out.
Here's the first installment, which was reported as an actual true story some years ago:
Enjoy. Look for another next SaturdaySuper Granny: Defender of Justice(a true story)
An elderly lady did her shopping and, upon returning to her car, found four males in the act of leaving with her vehicle.
She dropped her shopping bags and drew her handgun, proceeding to scream at them at the top of her voice, "I have a gun and I know how to use it! Get out of the car you scum bags!"
The four men didn't wait for a second invitation but got out and ran like mad, whereupon the lady, somewhat shaken, proceeded to load her shopping bags into the back of the car and get into the driver's seat.
She was so shaken that she could not get her key into the ignition. She tried and tried and then it dawned on her why. A few minutes later she found her own car parked four or five spaces farther down.
She loaded her bags into her car and drove to the police station. The sergeant to whom she told the story nearly tore himself in two with laughter and pointed to the other end of the counter, where four pale white males were reporting a carjacking by a mad elderly woman described as white, less than 5' tall, glasses, and curly white hair carrying a large handgun.
No charges were filed.