Newt "Pinocchio" Gingrich

newt: n., an amphibian of the Salamandridae family. Adult newts are characterized by a frog-like body and the ability to regenerate severed limbs. Most newts can be safely handled, provided that the toxins they produce are not ingested. [Wikipedia]

Pinocchio: a fictional puppet carved from a piece of pine wood (Pinocchio = pine nut) who dreams of becoming a real boy. The woodcarver gave him a long nose that became even longer every time he told a lie. [Wikipedia]

Well . . . there we have our boy Newt: the pine nut who keeps regenerating himself, trying to lie his way back into the limelight and hoping a clamorous crowd will urge him to run for president.

People should heed Wikipedia: be careful not to ingest the toxins in this newt's new book, To Save America: Stopping Obama’s Secular-Socialist Machine, in which he claims that the Obama administration is:

“a corrupt bureaucracy which uses manipulation, bribery, and dishonesty to steamroll the will of the people and destroy America’s core values. . . . The secular socialist machine represents as great a threat to America as Nazi Germany or the Soviet Union once did.”

Oh, Newt, Newt. As my grandmother used to say, "Be ashamed of yourself."

You know full well that this is nothing but utter pandering to the paranoid right wing fringe, hoping the Tea Party crowd will jump on the bandwagon and draft you as their standard bearer. How do you look in the mirror, Newt? You're way too smart to believe this crap, this toxin that you're spewing forth.

But Newt's attention-craving has no limits. He'll take a mandate anywhere he can find it.

As Jim Fitzgerald said in review of the book in Like the Dew: A Journal of Southern Culture and Politics:

Personally, I think his only purpose is to fan flames and keep people “hot” for the November midterm elections. Oh, and to sell his book.

Be ashamed of yourself, Little Newtie.

Ralph