TGFM . . . well, sort of

Follow up to my "Thank God for Mississippi" comment in yesterday's post, "Lower than the low," about the Mississippi school that canceled the senior prom rather than let a lesbian student bring her girlfriend:

Part of that TGFM feeling was the contrast with a parallel story about the gay teen age boy from Cochran, Georgia (pop, 5,000) who has been given permission by his local school board to bring his boyfriend to the senior prom.

The AJC story made it sound rather nice: the school board had voted to allow this. It did mention that Derrick Martin was not living at home now, but the implication was that he was staying with friends because of all the media attention, which includes an invitation to appear on the Ellen DeGeneris TV show.

Not so fast: the gay newspaper Georgia Voice has a long article in today's issue that paints a less nice picture. The school principle first said no, because it had never been done before and the school was not ready for it. But as Derrick has said, "I wasn't going to back down. I wasn't confrontational. I just kept telling the truth."

So the principle, to her credit, agreed to take it to the school board. On advice from their attorney, they eventually agreed, because there is no policy prohibiting same-sex dates.

But all is not sweetness and light. The school board say yes, not because it was the right thing to do, but because they had no legal justification for saying no.

A student group has held a rally, encouraging students to "come protest these queers." The group is organizing an alternate prom. One senior girl said, "I don't believe in going up there and dancing with gay guys like that," and she told Derrick that he wasn't a Christian. Others have accused him of bringing a bad name to Cochran. He's been called "a queer" and "a faggot," and he has received veiled threats.

And why is Derrick not living at home? According to this article, his parents kicked him out after he gave an interview on a local tv station. He is staying with a female friend.

It's not just the recent media attention, however. When Derrick's parents first found out he is gay 18 months ago, they took his car, his iPod, his phone, and his laptop to prevent him from communicating with the boy he was seeing then. They vehemently disapprove of his current boyfriend/prom date, Richard, who lives in a town two hours away. They met through Facebook. Richard has never been allowed to visit in Derrick's home, and his mother once threatened to call the cops because he was in their yard.

The important story here is about 18 year old Derrick Martin himself, who seems to be the most mature person in the whole affair. He says that "everything I have gone through has made me stronger." Even so, he is not bitter toward his parents, saying that it's their house and they had a right to ask him to leave.

Most important of all is the grace and maturity with which Derrick has endured all this. He even attended the rally staged to denounce him, "just to show my face and show them I wasn't afraid." He will enter Georgia Southern College on a scholarship this fall as a pre-law major.

To come back to TGFM: There is still plenty of bigotry and fear and hate in both MS and GA. But here's a big contrast: In MS, the liberals had to stage the alternate prom after the school chose to have none rather than allow same-sex couples to dance. In GA, it was the bigoted, queer-bashers who had to stage an alternate prom so they didn't have share a dance floor with gay guys.

That's some progress.

Best wishes and support to a very courageous and mature 18 year old pre-law student, Derrick Martin. You have my vote for Attorney General in 2032.

Ralph